Potty Training {for boys}

Well at 29 months of age (July 2012) we decided to take the plunge and begin the potty training process with Lincoln.  We have several friends in our small group who recommended the this website and ebook for our potty training venture.  I loved this ebook because it is about 30 pages and straight to the point.  I hated to have to read a 100+ page book on potty training.  It just seemed silly.  So I definitely recommend this ebook for those who are looking for a concise approach to potty training. 

Bootcamp Overview:

We made a poster for Lincoln to be able to put stickers on.  I also made a poster of our "schedule" for the day as well as key points to remember.  Lincoln is an intense all-boy child and you just HAVE to be one step ahead of him in all things or he will not buy into your games. It also helped for me and Cory to be on the same page.  Cory also read it the ebook too. I also wrote out Emery's eating/sleeping schedule for a typical day so that Cory (who was in charge of Em) would know what needed to be done with her while I was tending to Lincoln.  We used M&M's to give Lincoln after each time he went to the bathroom and also let him put a sticker on the chart. We also had a "goodie bag" that he could pick prizes from when he would go long periods of time with no accidents or achieve other milestones in the process. As the days went on we faded out the candy, stickers and rewards.   We also decided to just start with day training Lincoln and putting pull-ups on him for naptime and bedtime. Nightime training will be for another day!

Day one - we woke up, put underwear on Lincoln, showed him that we threw away all the diapers and went about our day.  Anytime that Lincoln started to have an accident we just ran him into the bathroom to go potty.  At the end of day one he had had 9 accidents.  Yes you read that correctly.  9.  However, right before he went to bed that night he started to get it and had his first success of telling us he needed to go potty and he went.

Day two -- Lincoln had 4 accidents on this day. He went to pee pee about 8-9 times during this day by telling us he had to go and then going.  He was accident free up until naptime so all 4 of his accidents were in the afternoon.  He did have to go poo poo but never went and held it till we put the pull up on him at naptime and went. By later that evening he was back on track asking to go and peeing in the potty.  Even after we put his pull up on him about 8:15 for bed he came and told us he needed to go pee pee and went a lot.

Day three --  on days one and two Cory was at home to help me with Emery.  So day three was my first day to fly solo and do it on my own.  Lincoln did great on the third day.  He only had 2 accidents all day.  This was the first day he was successful in pooping in the potty for the first time.  We had told Lincoln that when he went pooped in the potty for the first time that he would get a new spiderman mask that we had hung up in the bathroom to remind him.  When he finally pooped in the potty he was SO excited to get his new mask.

Since the bootcamp....
For the next month he had good days and bad days. It was not as if at the end of the third day he had it completely down and has never had an accident since.  However, when we were at home for the day he did great and rarely has an accident.  He may have one accident about every other day.  It continued to be a process to get him to poop in the potty but he soon caught on and went several days without an accident.

For the second month he was having them about once every few days.  And at the beginning of month three it was like a light bulb switched for him.  Honestly, I think he was trying to hold out to see if were going to back down on this and we weren't so he decided to get on board.  From that point forward he has gone weeks without any potty accidents and at least a week at a time between pooping accidents.  Now we are focusing on rewarding him if he goes in there by himself.  Lincoln HATES to be alone so this is big feat for him, but he has done it pretty consistently.  And he can also independently go alone but I still have to put his clothes back on.  He also still wears a pull-up for naptime and bedtime.  So, maybe in a few months when he no longer sleeps in a crib we will look to work on those skills. 


My notes...

Here are some random notes that I have learned through the potty training process:

• The first thing that I think that has helped Lincoln is that I put him on the potty backwards, facing the toilet.  It helps because he can see it better and it gives a bigger part of the toilet to pee in so it makes less of a mess.  It also helps to prepare him for the future when he learns to stand up
• In the beginning we did put some cheerios in the toilet to help give Lincoln something to aim at.  
• This method is hardcore!  It is exhausting.  At the end of day 1 I was SO tired.  Day two was a little better and by day three I felt better.  You have to be 100% committed to it.  And it is definitely worth it.  
• Lincoln is a big drinker but since being potty trained I have had to be more conscious about how much he is drinking and limiting his drinking.  In the beginning he was going to the bathroom so much that he was burnt out on going.  
• In the beginning Lincoln was very timid to poop in the potty so he would hold it and then do it in his pull up or have accidents in his underwear.  A friend in my small group's son also had this same problem and the doctor recommended giving him some Miralax to make it easier to go.  I started this with Lincoln and it has helped him tremendously.  I just put a little bit in his drink in the mornings.
• In order to go this 3 training route you need lots of underwear on hand.  We went through about 16 pairs of underwear in the first three days.
• I have read several books that suggest there is a window of opportunity with the age of the child.  This is from about 22 months - 30 months of age.  After that age, I have read it can be more difficult to train the child because they are more set in their ways and fight it.  I am potty training Lincoln towards the end of this range and I would have to agree with this philosophy.  Ideally I would have liked to potty train Lincoln a little bit earlier but with having Emery three months ago we have been a little busy to start it yet.
• Constant praise from you as well as grandparents or friends is very important.
• I had to keep reminding myself that this is a huge new skill he is learning and to be patient with him.  I wanted this process to happen much faster than it did.  So, I tried not to beat myself up over it all and just let it happen.  It was hard though because after he was still having accidents often 2 months later my patience was thin.  I definitely had moments where I got upset with him and that definitely did not help the process.  So....be patient and love him through it all!!
• Lastly, the most important concept that I learned through the process is emphasizing and praising when they are "dry" instead of focusing on when they do go potty.  We  not only gave Lincoln rewards when he went the potty but we would also do "dry checks" randomly throughout the day. He would have to check if he was dry and if he was then he could put a sticker on the chart and sometimes he would get a prize as well.  This has really stuck with Lincoln and helped him to understand the whole idea much better.  

I highly recommend this method though.  I just don't think the approach of putting a pull up on Lincoln and asking him to keep it dry would work for him.  I know it does work for some though.  I just wanted to document our journey for my own sake and for anyone out there who needs a picture of exactly how it went down for another little guy.  I am glad to be done with potty training for at least another 2 more years.  It will give me time to recover!! 

O and after everything settled out and he had the light bulb moment we got our carpets professionally cleaned!  :)